Perspective

Yes my confusion is still here but it seems less important. Having a major health crisis in the family does put less important things in perspective. My mother-in-law's health took a decline this week. Is it life threatening? Yes it could be. Hopefully the medical intervention has stopped further decline. Since her EOL (end of life) decisions have been made acceptable treatment is limited. The one thing that could give her more time is a ventilator, she doesn't want that. She doesn't want to be kept alive by artificial means nor does she want brought back if she dies. She made these decisions a long time ago and confirmed her EOL decisions this time. She will be 71 on Halloween

She has approximately 15% lung function and her lungs are no longer able to do their job. She is getting CO2 build up in her blood. She did agree to a bipap (non invasive ventilation) which she wears continuously at night and every 2 hours during the day. When she's not on the bipap she's on 5 litres of oxygen. She also has carbon monoxide building up in her lungs.  The carbon monoxide and CO2 can have devastating consequences.

We honestly don't know from hour to hour what's going on. We just support her and our family any way we can. Last night I quietly sat by her bed listening to her sleep, stroking her hand. My sister-in-law hasn't left her side for almost a week so we brought her a hot meal and a few things she might need . We gave her a small break so she could rest. Family is family. During times like this petty problems seem not important and families come together. My husband and his sister don't always get along but the compassion shown is unmistakable. My sister-in-law is in the process of being diagnosed with MS and stress can be detrimental but she sleeps in a chair at the end of her mom's bed.

My own confusion seems less important and made me realize what is. Family.